Giving Thanks

     On a day where most people think about family reunions and eating way too much dinner, I'm sitting at home thinking about all the things I have to thanks-give for.

     I have a big home and lots of stuff - a big TV, a computer or laptop in nearly every room, several game consoles, a wall covered in DVD's and Xbox games, craft stuff spread throughout my room, enough books to make a small library, and drawers and drawers of good clothes. I have a great family - a dad I respect and trust, a mom I look up to and admire, a brother that still seeks my help and keeps me strong and on my toes. No sisters, but I make up for that by surrounding myself with fantastic coworkers and friends. I love an amazing Christian man (he may or may not love me back but you know, if I knew he loved me I might fall into the temptation of calling my life just short of perfection). I live in a pretty decent neighborhood. I love my job and the places I work. I have plenty of delicious food (too much occasionally) every day. I have pets that entertain me. I have time to make and create and write.

     Yes, I don't just have a good life. Even if you were to take it all away and force me to start all over again, I would still call myself one of the most blessed of people on Earth.

     Why?
     Because given me are riches far beyond anything on Earth that cannot be taken from me.
     Because given me is a Forgiveness and a Healing from my mistakes, stupid moments, and outright pain and lies I intentionally inflicted on others.
     Because given me is a Love greater than all the love my friends and family can give me combined.

     I will give thanks to Jesus Christ for all the blessings in my life until its end.

my pain is for you

Why should I care?
I mess up. I make mistakes.
My life is too crazy, too busy, to think about anyone but myself.
Why should I care about you and your life and your problems?
I have enough of my own.
But still I care.
Still I take the time to help out.
Still I look around the world I live in -
and see the hurt.
I see the pain.
The struggle.
And I forget my problems.
I forget my own worries for the moment.
And think about you.
Why do you cry?
Why is your heart broken?
Your life a wreck?
And I think about others.
Why does he delve in drugs and drink?
Why is she so horrible to everyone else?
Why is there a little kid sitting in the alley?
Why is your life a wreck?
Along with so many.
Overwhelmed by the sight,
I am not even aware of "my own little world" anymore.
I reach out.
Will you take my hand?
You see the pain in my eyes?
It is not for me,
it is for you.
If only I could take your pain away.
And make it my own.
If only I could carry your burden.
Carry your cross.
If only I could keep you from suffering.
My pain is for you.
All of you.
The whole world.
Yet I am not even big enough to take care of my own problems.
What am I to do?
I want to love the whole world.
To heal it with just a touch of my hand.
Yet even my own heart is not free of breaking.
What do I do?
Just ignore you?
Try to fix myself?
Look for a fellow human to lean on?
No.
He has his own problems too.
Where do I turn,
but back to the One that made me care.
The one who made me want to help you.
The only one that can help you.
The one that said,
"I care. And I can heal the world. My pain is for you."
The only one that was more than human.
The Beloved of God.
Greater than the angels.
Born among us.
Jesus.
The pain He faced was for you.

Frozen Flower

Frozen flower.

Alone in the snow.

You grew the same time the others did,

yet now you choose to bloom?

Frozen flower.

While they are dead you still stand.

Can you feel the cold?

Do you know it’s Winter?

How long will you stand?

Frozen flower.

Even your time must end.

Do you await the Sun?

Do you hold a secret?

Frozen flower.

You have died.

But what is this?

A new flower arises

in the spring.

Many flowers.

Frozen flower.

You gave us strength.