I know I've talked about this before. But this is something I've been learning for quite some time now and it still impacts me.
We live in a world of social media. So many methods of communication and keeping in touch with others. We can connect with the whole world. And every mistake you make can be broadcasted across our space and getting it removed and forgotten is harder than ever. So what do we do? We build walls.
We develop ways of hiding ourselves. We wear a mask, smiling, nodding, pretending like everything's alright. Our deepest secrets we bury inside ourselves and hope no one comes our way to break down our self-made cage.
Because that is what it is. My Hero spent his life on Earth with no cage, no walls, no mask. Said, "This is who I AM." Are we not to do the same? Are we not loved for who we are? Then why do we compare ourselves to others, hiding the imperfections and differences?
Even I still do this. I should know better. But I still find myself trying to compare with others, to measure up to others. Asking myself, "What do they think of me? Have I done enough or gone too far?"
We fear being unloved. We fear the pain of rejection. As a Christian there's another level added to that. To be told "I don't want your Jesus" hurts. A lot. And I started to question myself whether I actually believed what I did. I started to question my insanity and if it was worth it. Looking around I started to compare myself with those around me. Those who denied Jesus and used The Name as a curse word seemed to have it better than me. They knew who they were.
Then I watched a coworker go through a relationship faster than I thought possible. She was so happy and in love and then it faded so fast. And she questioned everything too. Then she asked me why I was so happy all the time. Everywhere I turned people were telling me this. I was called cute, spunky, energetic, a rock star, twinkle toes, Cinderella, happy. They envied me. What did I have that they didn't?
Nothing. Nothing except...my Everything.
Even if I lost all my possessions, my home, my family, my friends, my health, I would still have my Everything. My I AM. God loves the whole world. I was only different from them in the fact that I took God's Love and ran with Him, my hand in His scarred hand. Who knew a Wound like that would meaning healing for my own? I am filled to overflowing with the love of God. And that love that forgave my sin set me free. Free to become the person God wants me to be. To stop comparing myself to others and stand up and say, "I know who I am."
Joy may not be a great sounding name, but the meaning sums me up nicely. It is the tears of happiness when I'm singing to God. It is the smile across my face that came up out of nowhere and I haven't a clue why I'm smiling. It's the peace looking at the sunset or standing quietly on the mountaintop. It's the rush of riding river rapids or looking over the Grand Canyon. This is who I am.
Has God shown you who you are?
We live in a world of social media. So many methods of communication and keeping in touch with others. We can connect with the whole world. And every mistake you make can be broadcasted across our space and getting it removed and forgotten is harder than ever. So what do we do? We build walls.
We develop ways of hiding ourselves. We wear a mask, smiling, nodding, pretending like everything's alright. Our deepest secrets we bury inside ourselves and hope no one comes our way to break down our self-made cage.
Because that is what it is. My Hero spent his life on Earth with no cage, no walls, no mask. Said, "This is who I AM." Are we not to do the same? Are we not loved for who we are? Then why do we compare ourselves to others, hiding the imperfections and differences?
Even I still do this. I should know better. But I still find myself trying to compare with others, to measure up to others. Asking myself, "What do they think of me? Have I done enough or gone too far?"
We fear being unloved. We fear the pain of rejection. As a Christian there's another level added to that. To be told "I don't want your Jesus" hurts. A lot. And I started to question myself whether I actually believed what I did. I started to question my insanity and if it was worth it. Looking around I started to compare myself with those around me. Those who denied Jesus and used The Name as a curse word seemed to have it better than me. They knew who they were.
Then I watched a coworker go through a relationship faster than I thought possible. She was so happy and in love and then it faded so fast. And she questioned everything too. Then she asked me why I was so happy all the time. Everywhere I turned people were telling me this. I was called cute, spunky, energetic, a rock star, twinkle toes, Cinderella, happy. They envied me. What did I have that they didn't?
Nothing. Nothing except...my Everything.
Even if I lost all my possessions, my home, my family, my friends, my health, I would still have my Everything. My I AM. God loves the whole world. I was only different from them in the fact that I took God's Love and ran with Him, my hand in His scarred hand. Who knew a Wound like that would meaning healing for my own? I am filled to overflowing with the love of God. And that love that forgave my sin set me free. Free to become the person God wants me to be. To stop comparing myself to others and stand up and say, "I know who I am."
Joy may not be a great sounding name, but the meaning sums me up nicely. It is the tears of happiness when I'm singing to God. It is the smile across my face that came up out of nowhere and I haven't a clue why I'm smiling. It's the peace looking at the sunset or standing quietly on the mountaintop. It's the rush of riding river rapids or looking over the Grand Canyon. This is who I am.
Has God shown you who you are?
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