A Lover's Lament

I'm standing on this bridge alone. You walked away.
But I should have known you would.
I hurt you.
So why should you stay?
You were waiting for me. You wanted me to be your one and only.
I wanted it too.
I was in love with you.
But I loved another.
My first love.
A greater love. A perfect love.
A love that held me back. Told me I wasn't ready.
Told me that love is stronger than passion.
Told me that passion was all I had for you.
I didn't want to hear it. I didn't want to listen.
You loved me. I wanted you.
We were perfect for each other.
You were waiting for me.
I was broken inside.
And still I turned away.
The perfect chance and I trashed it. My thorns had left you hurt.
I couldn't bear it.
But it was the choice I made. And I couldn't take it back.
I was being saved for later.
My first love was holding me back. Keeping me ready for another of His choice.
The one to handle thorny me was yet to come.
But I wanted you.
But I could only say no to my own wants. And not to the Keeper of my heart.
I hurt you.
I didn't mean to hurt you.
I know saying this doesn't change anything but...
I'm sorry.