Hope (A Verbal Painting)

A lone candle...burning in a dark room...its light beckoning you to stand in the rays of its tiny flame.
A trickle of water...splashing droplets over a trellis into a dry stone jar...a dipper ladle waiting on the edge for you to take it up and taste.
A beam of sunlight...peeking through the mountains...dawn's ray caressing your cheek after a sleepless night.
A warrior...battle scarred...returning home to beloved family.
A destitute child...body worn and hungry...looking up at you with smiling eyes...happy to be alive.

The flame blown out.
The rain stops too soon.
The day doesn't last.
The warrior has to leave for another war.
The child falls ill.

The shadows draw close.
The ground dries and dust fills the air.
Nightmares claim the night.
Fear grips the warrior.
The child cannot breathe.

An ember.
A droplet.
A glimmer.
A song.
A breath.

And then you see it.

Flames and Water and Light and a Dove and Wind.

The Spirit.

Bringer of Hope.

A Unique Bloom

     I walk through a garden, filled with many blooms. Each flower grows in its time and in its beauty. Unique. I make my way down the path, passing by life after life, beauty after beauty. Some draw my eye quickly, some I have to take care not to pass without giving them at least some recognition. Wish I had the many lifetimes' worth to give equal care to all and get to truly appreciate each one. But in my imperfection as a human, I have missed so many along the way. Only the Gardener can see to them all.
     But every once in a while, one flower will stand out in my vision, seeming to be right in front of me, capturing my full attention. What is this rarity? I ask myself. Why do I find myself so focused? I worried that I would reach out and touch the fragile petals gracing the heavy stem and possibly ruin the blossom before me. I feared I might hurt myself on the thorns. And then I grew concerned that my attention may be growing too singular, my admiration of this exquisite creation too strong.
     I longed to dig up the bloom and take it with me, unlike simply taking a single petal of remembrance to preserve as I have done with a good portion before. Or to become rooted myself and to stay beside that lovely flower. For who was I to know that I would ever come across one like this or better than this unique one? I fearfully kept myself at arm's length, wanting to let myself love and not just appreciate for a time. Only the Gardener would know where my path would lead.
    
     This is not actually about flowers.

     This is about my life and my interactions with fellow humans. Recently I had several very emotionally vulnerable moments with someone. I'm extremely grateful God put that person there right when I needed it most. As I heard only an hour or two ago, "It doesn't take very long for you to know you've met someone special." But I've started to question what that role of that person is in my life. Am I only to hold loosely, for my fellow human will most assuredly leave in time and I may never see that face, hear that voice, and enjoy that company and friendship ever again? Or am I free to clasp those hands and hug that person with joy and without hesitation for I have found a friendship I can keep?
     This is nothing new. It's just harder this time around because I recognize potential - certain possibilities that were not there with the other friendships I have grown to trust and cherish simply because they are married, in a relationship, or not my type. The struggle, though still there, is far less intense when the possibilities aren't there. Do I have a crush? No. Any time those feelings arise I cut them down. Yes there is the possibility for something more, but I don't want to mess this friendship up by giving control over to something as fickle as feelings that come and go like the clouds in the sky.
     But enough about that. My concern is encouraging a friendship that won't last. A people person I may be, extroverted tendencies I may have, but the fact of the matter is I am so insecure, so unsure. I need God's guiding hand more and more every day.

I Pray For Fire

The shadows dance. The shadows laugh. "Victory!" they cry.
The demon Despair runs a pale finger through my hair, whispering of failure.
His brother Regret clutches my ankles, muttering about my mistakes.
Cousins Fear and Depression giggle from the doorway, awaiting their turn.
Loathing, Self-righteousness, and Revenge fling their knives at my back.
"Burn!" they all scream. "Burn! Take your fire and burn yourself and everyone around you!"
My head is bowed as my strength fades.
My heart is heavy with the knowledge of my failure.
My soul is wounded from betrayal, mourning the loss of one whom I called friend.
"Worthless," hiss the shadows in my ear. "Your efforts of kindness are in vain."
Tears find my cheeks as I turn my soul to the Enemy of demons, the One who rules all destinies. I cry for comfort, for hope, for strength. I weep over the loss and my wrongs. I lift my hands in submission not to the demons in this place, but to the God who lives. And I pray for Fire.
The Fire that burns away all impure things.
I pray for Him to burn away all things wrong from me, to give me the pain that declares I am being made new. I pray for Fire.
The Fire that lights up the darkness so the shadows must flee.
I pray for Him to burn the shadows as He promised long ago, to keep them from hurting anyone else. Lord let me be their last taste of human suffering. I pray for Fire.
I raise my voice in song, in worship of He who loves me. I speak words of love to the One who led me to strive in the first place, knowing He will pick me back up again.
I may be down now, but I will rise once more. I may be wounded, but I will heal. Because I know He who sends me eagles' wings. Because I know the Healer who conquered Death, living again.
Begone, shadows. Remove your grip from we who live here and never return. Begone in the Name of Jesus the Risen King! Oppress us no more! Begone!
Lord, I lay me down to sleep, this house is Yours. It belongs to You. I belong to You. You love me and I worship You. I belong to You. Burn me away until only You remain.